06: ABC Day Sies

Well, it's almost 8 in the morning and I'm not sure why I'm up so damn early. I wanted to sleep. But anyways, today's calorie allotment is 200 but I'm not going to eat anything to make up for the pizza yesterday... that just really makes me feel like shit. I'm going to start working out as soon as I warm up a bit. The more calories I burn, the better. I like mornings because my stomach is really flat, and I can see my hipbones and sort of see my ribs really well. I'm not going to trust my scale until around 6 tonight. I may go and visit my best guy friend, C. If he texts me, otherwise I won't. Or, I may not be able to weigh myself at all because my best girl friend might want me to go to her house and stay the night. In which case, I'll have to be careful not to eat anything because she's constantly eating. I'm not worried about it at all though, because I don't feel hunger. Hopefully it lasts all day. And the good thing about staying with her is that I can say I don't feel good or some bullshit and she won't like, force me to eat, and then my dad won't be there to force me to eat and all will be well, because I won't have to eat today. Tomorrow... I'll probably end up eating whatever the calorie limit is if i lose from last night (66.6). Everything i do today will be aimed towards losing weight. FUCK. I hope my stupid step mom doesn't decided to make breakfast... i CANT eat right now. I don't want to eat. I could always pretend I went back to sleep when I hear them start moving around and so when they come to wake me up they'll think I'm not up and they'll eat without me and later I'll just pretend to eat. I have no desire to eat, it just seems really disgusting to me right now. I'm laying on my stomach, and I'm not content with what i've done yet because I can feel my stomach pressing on the bed and I used to be able to feel my hips and my ribs poking the bed. I think I was like 136. But if I put my hands in fists on my pelvis, I can feel my hip bones poking into my wrists. I can feel the bones in my shoulder becoming sharper, but you can't really see it yet. And when i run my thumb over my side, i can feel my ribs. My legs seem a lot smaller but there's really no telling. If I lose a lot of weight in my legs fast I'll be pretty excited, I don't really notice much else, besides my face being thinner and my wrists are kind of starting to shrink. Can wait to take pictures on Sunday, I really should have taken them last week as well so you can see what I started at. Oh well. I think I'm going to go back to sleep for a while and when I get up I'l work out.